after ‘Ae Fond Kiss’ by Robert Burns
It calls to me in my heart and thoughts, aye,
a homeland so distant, but yet I am fond
of its thistle name pricking my lips, as we kiss.
I yearn to trace my finger along its borders and
steel a caress over its hilly landscape, only then
will it feel like home. Finally the end is nigh and we
shall be brought together in unison that nothing can sever.
It is true that the bagpipes serenade my dreams; ae,
I hear them as I fall a slumber. But alas I must say farewell
to my past self for now I am changed and
my longing for home pulls me close to you - then
I shall take my leave; a-joining you on Scottish soil - forever.
I am home. I breathe in Scottish air deep
into the barrels of my lungs - taking in
the moment; a lump in my throat - heart-wrung,
I well up at the thought of finding my roots; tears
attaching themselves to the corner of my eyes. I’ll
have to steady myself before I progress and make my pledge
to my new home. I shall never leave thee.
No longer shall my heart be torn; agonisingly warring
over where it’s home resides; now it slowly sighs,
as realisation of the depths of my ancestry and
the past that has been hidden and silent groans
awaiting to tell their stories. However, I’ll
be patient, for them to recall their accounts and wage
their fondness and familiarity upon thee.
Curiosity has always made me question; Who?
Where? When? Why? How? But we shall
endeavour to hear what our new countrymen say
in their native tongues, ensuring that
I become accustomed to the new ways. For fortune
has shown its hand and has opened eyes to what grieves
my thoughts, looking above for answers from Him.
Answers come in the form of action, while
I travelled to my new home. I can recount the
times that I envisioned myself here, guided by a single star.
The journey lasting a number of
hours allowed for contemplation and anticipation of hope
that the home I so envisaged is as she,
my Grandmother, foretold. I take my leave
of the past, looking to the future, with permission from Him.
For now I feel complete, whole - which is weird, me,
assured in myself and in my past. I shall nae
forget this moment and how cheerful’
it makes me - with a crystal like twinkle
exclaiming loudly it’s clarity and lights
the path that I need to take; now clearly shown before me.
No longer shall my thoughts contain dark
and desperate illusions, leading to despair.
For now that I can truly say that I am around
my new home. My journey nae longer benights
my dreams. Scottish soil shall nae need to call to me!